Whew. This last week really took it out of me. I think most of you can probably relate. I’ve always been one of those weirdo Monday lovers, but was worried I’d wake up wanting to take a four year nap. I woke up somehow refreshed though, feeling better than I thought I would. I think I’ve crossed the threshold. My frustration and anger is morphing into hope and momentum. I wasn’t sure I would ever get here. But this is how I’m doing it.
Stop wasting time and energy fighting Trump support.
I said I was dunzo last week, and I meant it. The time for polite acceptance of harmful and antiquated ideas is O-V-E-R. It’s 2017 for fuck’s sake. I completely understand that we are a diverse bunch. We might want different things and we may disagree on the details of how things should be done, but this is no longer that. Look, I am not a things-are-black-and-white type of girl. It’s almost always shades of gray. It used to always “depend” with me, but not anymore. If you are still defending this guy, I send you love and compassion. I send love and compassion to anyone still willing to go to bat for you about it or try to convince you of the other side. But for the sake of my sanity and strength…IDFWU on this one anymore.
I’ve searched the whole of the world wide web. I’ve been to all the corners of my mind and the deepest, darkest parts of my heart looking for a valid reason to compromise here and I have come up short. Money, power, and political parties over humanity and our home planet? That is not the kind of world I want to live in–now or ever. So for now, I must separate myself and hope that one day we will come together again. I wouldn’t be the woman I’ve worked so hard to become if I didn’t stand up for what I know is right. My words and my time need to be spent elsewhere. And my offer to hug you if and when you’re ready to come around? It’s good until the end of time.
START spending more time and energy on doing what you can, educating yourself, and connecting with people you care about.
These are crazy, heavy times. There’s a lot of BS out there. A LOT. And I get sucked into it way too easily. In a time when it feels like everything is unraveling, it’s been important for me to find those things that keep me grounded and level-headed. I text my family. I call my Dad. I send heart emojis to friends I haven’t talked to in a while. I read up on history and dig for facts about what’s actually happening, promising myself that I will not have knee-jerk reactions to headlines. I learn about the president, the people around him, and the people who are being directly affected by his actions. I decide on one or two issues that are most important to me, and try to figure out how I can be most helpful. I donate a few bucks. I write a few words. I dance in my kitchen. I take some deep breaths. Little by little, however I can, I focus on what really matters to me.
Gratitude, gratitude, and more gratitude.
When I first saw of the protests happening at JFK I burst into tears. I still don’t know if I’m more sensitive to this particular issue or if it was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. It was as if I could feel the pain of every hurting human on the planet.
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
This is the type of human I choose to be. I want to be able to feel what others feel and find connection with someone on the other side of the world I’ll never meet. I have specifically chosen experiences so that I feel this way. I’ve traveled through third world countries and spent months of my life “showering” with a bowl and a 32 gallon garbage can full of cold water. I donated a year of my life after college to public service. I spent my twenties working jobs created for the sole purpose of helping underserved minorities. I did these things because I thought they were important for me to understand the world I live in and understand my role in it.
There are also experiences that we don’t choose for ourselves, like where we’re was born or how we’re raised, or untimely and tragic deaths of friends and family. I had no control over the history I’ve been exposed to, like coming home from school like any other day to see the Columbine shootings all over the news, or sitting in English class getting word that an airplane just flew into the Twin towers, or seeing our first black president elected to office, followed by the first woman candidate who almost won, or even watching the world go from my Dad’s first Zack Morris cell phone to an iPhone that’s seems to be an extension of my arm sometimes.
Some of these things may not compare to what many have experienced, but this is my story and I wouldn’t be who I am without each and every part of it. And sometimes you get to choose, but a lot of times you’ll never see it coming, whatever “it” is gonna be. Either way, what a fucking time to be alive, to be witness, to be part of the process of humans just trying to figure out how to live and grow and do the right thing.
If you can get down to that, strip all the way down to having gratitude for simply existing, it will move you. It will change you. And you should let it.
Check out. Byeee.
For as long as you need to. In whatever way you need to. My personal go-tos are long walks on the beach, sunsets, and anything created by Andy Cohen. And videos of Earth from space. Always videos of earth from space. My favorites are here, here, and here. They’re the best way I’ve found to pull me out of whatever hole I’m digging and give me some perspective. We’re on a living, breathing ROCK. Floating through SPACE! Damn.
Find hope and inspiration wherever you can.
Pictures and video from the Women’s March and other protests. Articles about celebrities, business owners, and thought leaders taking a stand, matching donations, and offering free services. People processing their pain into art, and coming together in the most unexpected, creative ways.
Tweets like this:
I’m 20 minutes from landing at JFK. Pilot just warned us about delays due to #NoBan protests at T4.
The passengers’ response?
— John Paul Farmer (@johnpaulfarmer) January 29, 2017
And posts like this:
In the words of Mr. Rogers, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”
They’re everywhere if you know where to look.
And whatever you do, don’t forget to laugh.
Cred: Vincent Peone